Divorce to Remarriage: Band-Aid or Brain Surgery After the Divorce?

Divorce stinks! It hurts a lot of people. Your children are hurt because the family they were a part of is over. Both you and your ex-spouse are hurt too. It doesn’t matter if you initiated the divorce or not, some hurt remains. There were hurtful things that happened in the marriage that lead to the divorce weren’t there? Withdrawal, attack, insults, infidelity, and outright anger are all typical steps that lead people down the road toward a divorce decision.

If that hurt isn’t dealt with it becomes an extra appendage that you carry with you wherever you go. Most people like to ignore that hurt and “move on” just as fast as possible. It’s understandable. I don’t think anyone’s first choice would be to choose pain. Instead, we like to slap a band-aid on our wounds and go, don’t we?

Well, that doesn’t work so well with divorce hurts. The old band-aid just isn’t enough. Instead, inflammation, and eventually infection tend to set in if ignored. It may not seem real obvious at first, but give it time. The real problem for most people is when they “move on” and carry that infection into a new marriage and the creation of a step family.

This is the first in a series of articles in which we will evaluate some of these infections and you will learn how to go about cleansing them, repairing them, and watching them heal. Most of the infections have to do with anger. This is the most common emotion felt during and right after a divorce. Yes, for some of you,

I look forward to sharing this journey with you. Consider this article a gift to yourself. Healing these infections is a great step toward effectively preparing yourself for a healthy and happy remarriage. Give yourself this gift and you will be on your way to experiencing Remarriage Success! Visit http://www.Remarriagesuccess.com for more information on how to prepare yourself and your family for a successful remarriage. I invite you to check out the new e-book "THE 7 Questions to Ask Before Saying 'I Do' Again" at http://www.Remarriagesuccess.com/7questions.htm to learn the most important 7 questions you may ever ask yourself. Alyssa Johnson, MSW, LCSW is the founder and CEO of Remarriage Success. She may be reached through her website at http://www.Remarriagesuccess.com where she encourages your feedback and suggestions.

 maybe even a lot of you, there was an initial sense of relief once the decision to divorce was made. However, anger usually begins to creep in soon than later.